Saturday, March 30, 2013
Just like any other Saturday, I was lying on my bed with my laptop. My phone rang and it was a call from an old friend. Heard you are going to Europe? Yes, who told you? I smiled while replying Well that doesn’t matter. I was just happy when I heard this news. We spoke for some more time and then he hung-up. He congratulated me as if I have achieved something big. After his call I started thinking about series of events, which happened in last two months. One of our reputed clients came to our office and interviewed a few people for a project. If selected, we had to go to their site in Europe for one month on-boarding program followed by trips after regular intervals. I was super exited. It seemed like a life-time opportunity. After the interview, I eagerly waited for the results. They took some time and when I got the news of my selection, I was on the top of the world. I felt like a winner. But my joy was short-lived. Some things and feelings were changing dramatically. After about a week, my excitement was almost gone but the world around me was reminding every moment that I am going abroad in some time. I was just wondering that why it is a big deal. All of a sudden, I had become an important person. I realized that I have started getting more respect from people around me. It was strange and to some extent disturbing. And then, I started analyzing it. I wanted to get the reasoning behind this change in people’s behavior. I also wanted to get the answer of my own questions…why my excitement lived so short? Efforts are more important than results…..I have heard many people saying this (or similar stuff), but actually it is not true. Very few people care about the efforts. It’s just result, which makes or breaks an individual’s image in the society. And this society only greets the one who is successful. (The world society sounds funny but it is a strong world, for those who believe in it and also for those who don’t.) A small foreign trip doesn’t make me a successful person but it creates a successful event in my life. An event when I am being treated as a winner. I am sure I am…I have always been…..but then why so much recognition suddenly. I know I am un-necessary over analyzing the situation but somewhere inside me, someone, was not happy about this change. This someone is an unsuccessful part of me who tried hard to achieve things in the life but failed due to some reasons. The one, who prepared for medical entrance exams and couldn’t clear it; the one, who changed his job coz he got defeated by the system; the one, who got a bad feedback after working hard in the projects; the one, who lost an argument even though he was correct and the one, who tried to make positive changes in people and failed to do so. All these failed parts of mine were disappointed because they didn’t get the respect they deserved. Reason...they didn’t win. Unfortunately, I have always been more close to the unsuccessful part of mine. And why shouldn’t I be, they need me more. I am sitting at T3 terminal of IG International Airport. I have to go to Switzerland via Austria. And then, I will go to Germany. I am thinking…this all scenario; an onsite opportunity, first international flight, upcoming thrill of two most developed foreign lands; is it worth taking so much of mine and others attention…...is it worth being a blog post? I don’t think so. But why do I want to be unfair to the one who achieved something. I have written posts about the unsuccessful ones. Is the unsuccessful parts of my soul are jealous of the successful part. If yes, why do I want to take their side? Why I am not that happy about something, which is supposed to be big. If I am, why can’t I feel it to that extent. I always knew…..the mirror, in front of which I am standing, has two faces.