Confidence

We were walking towards the cyber café to check Varun’s result. I knew he had worked really hard for this entrance exam. I was hoping that he would clear it; however, I had my doubts. Varun: I don’t think I have a chance Me: And why do you think so Varun: You should have seen the crowd. They all were from premier schools and colleges. Most of them were speaking so good English that I thought of returning back from there only. Trust me; I can never speak that good English Me: You don’t have to speak that good English. You have got good communication skills; it doesn’t matter that you can’t speak fancy English. And moreover, this is not only about English. There are so many other things Varun: I know and I am not saying I am bad or something, it’s just that there are people smarter than us and they have got more chances than us for sure. We will have to accept this fact Me: And why do you think they are smarter Varun: Most of them are from tier 1 cities, and from school and colleges, we have only dreamed of. We are from a small Hindi medium UP board school. This is just our hard work, which makes us think of at least giving this exam. I really don’t see any chances. Look at Vishal, he was topper in our batch, got 80% in 12th. He got KMC. Now see, if he had been in ICSE or CBSE board, the percentage would have been over 90, he would have got much better college. Me: KMC is not a bad college either, though I know he deserves better. But my point is that he is doing well for himself and so are we, why are you losing your confidence? Varun: I just don’t feel confident. There were boys and girls talking about applying in UCLA and LSE. Can you imagine their standard? I am not saying all of them have capability to go there but at least they think about it. Now compare our thoughts with them. We never even dream about such places. We both laughed. He continued...this is among most reputed MBA entrance exam. I am just afraid of standing against the most elite class of students And then look at those girls. I mean does beauty has any limit We both laughed Me: I guess this is a better topic to talk about Varun: Well, those girls were so smart. They were speaking like they are born and brought up in the US. I overheard the conversation of many groups. Just by standing beside them, I felt that I am the most un-suitable person for this course I laughed. There was something strange about us. We were from the same background, same city, same school, and when it comes to competition with the smarter world, we had same pain points. But we were happy most of the time, even when we are bitching about opportunities, we did not get. We had reached to a cyber café and I was opening the computer. I could hear his heartbeats. I could see some big aspirations in the eyes of a small town guy. I prayed for him but I had my doubts. I too was afraid of the smarter world out there. I typed the application number in a rectangular box in the middle of internet explorer tab and clicked enter. A revolving circle was showing that information has been passed from the websites server to the user interaction portal. I remember, I just said three words…99.6 percentile, shit